2 Rules for Life

In life, there are really only two rules. That's it.

Rule #1 - Don't be a dick.

Sometimes, it's really tempting to be a dick. I get it. Life throws a lot of little frustrations at us. Emotions well up and beg to be expressed.

Sometimes, we face people and situations that make us feel weak.There's a temptation to transfer that negative energy somewhere else. Usually to someone weaker. We want someone else to feel like we do.

When you transfer that energy, you're being a dick. 

When you shout at someone because you've had a shitty day at work, that's being a dick. When you nitpick the way someone does something because you've just been nitpicked yourself, you are being a dick. When you sigh loudly at someone struggling to get out of the train because you slept in and are late for work, you're a dick.

Cut the cycle of dickery. Don't pass it on. Surrender to that moment of feeling weak, engage in self care, and then decide whether you will accept the situation, change it, or leave it. 

Rule #2 - Be Excellent to Each Other

When you've mastered rule #1, the only other rule to follow in life is to be excellent to each other (all due credit to Bill & Ted for this turn of phrase).

Easier said than done. People can be difficult. Hard to understand. Sometimes they act down right vile.

Thing is, life is finite. And nothing in life is certain, including the duration of that life itself.

Since we've got this limited time with each other, it follows that there's no real advantage to being anything other than excellent to the people that you cross paths with. 

Hold doors for people. Say please and thank you. If someone falls down, help them up. If someone looks sad, ask them what's wrong and listen. Apologise when you hurt someone. Reach out to people you haven't heard from for a while and ask them how they are. Always make time for the people that you care about. Tell the people that you love that you love them. Tell them often. This is being excellent.

Today, I learned that someone I care about has died. It is deeply sad. I feel helpless in the face of such finality. I feel powerless facing this reality. I really don't want to say goodbye.

Out of this haze of grief, one thing I can see clearly is that I want my response to this tragedy to create something good. My friend that died lived life's two rules, and my friend's death has reminded me of why they are so important.

I want to make a deliberate and concentrated effort to be excellent to others, and I'd like to encourage you to do the same.

Go and show someone you care about them. Right now. It won't take long.